On Engagement

One definite trend I’m noticing in my research: when I’m stressed or feel like I have a lot going on, the engagement scores of my lessons and in my classes seem to go down. I don’t take the time to think about and look for fun, interesting activities when I feel overwhelmed, and I don’t think that is fair to my classes. If I’m committed to engagement as a priority, I need to be 100% committed, not just when I feel like it. My students will not benefit from the inconsistency. Structure and consistency are important, especially for younger students, and they shouldn’t have to walk into class wondering what to expect every day.

This trend is especially disturbing when I find myself falling back on more traditional methods of teaching, like lecturing and worksheets. I haven’t done this much, but I guess it’s true that you tend to fall back on the way you were taught when you’re unsure or not focused. I want learning to be fun and almost invisible, and there is a time and a place for direct instruction, but I don’t want to be using it simply because I can’t think of anything else or didn’t take the time to come up with anything more creative.

Planning is definitely a weakness of mine. That’s not to say that I walk into class not knowing what I’m doing that day, but I definitely do a lot of “night before” kind of stuff. The students would never know I haven’t planned things out weeks in advance (at least I hope they don’t, my mentor teachers have both said I’m always well prepared), but I often find myself coming up with minor things like journal topics later rather than sooner. Partially this plays into one of my strengths, as I’ve always done my best work when subjected to deadline pressure (being a perfectionist I’m paralyzed at times, until a looming deadline gives me no choice but to accept whatever I come up with), but it’s also an additional source of stress. It would be nice to have the whole term mapped out week by week, but I know I’d end up changing things, and it’s impossible to predict how far we’ll get when reading literature on a given day. Still, it might be helpful to force myself to come up with an outline for the rest of the year, even if I have to shift it around a bit. I can focus on the macro aspect of planning, and leave the micro pieces until the actual day draws nearer.